Odin's Callings To Me
Fair warning, this post will be quite long. This will be detailing the events that lead me to start seriously practicing, in no way is this informative of the gods and goddesses. Things marked with asterisk(*) will be explained at the very bottom of the post.
I have been trying to give a lot of thought as to what originally turned me to this path of Norse Paganism. (or the path of Asatru, Heathenism, The Old Ways, etc)
I really must say that I don't recall any strong individual reasons that led me to first 'pray'*; there's always been that dull presence of acknowledgement in my life of Norse 'mythology' since I was a child. Then again, is there anyone who hasn't given it any trace of thought, especially thesedays? With Marvel's Thor, Loki, and Odin characters in movies and comics becoming increasingly more popular, people are giving The Old Ways at least a little bit of attention. Perhaps incorrect or 'wrong' attention, but that's largely up for debate inside and outside of the Nordic Pagan communities [and also a topic for a future post].
Anyways, moving on.
It was sometime over a year ago, perhaps a year and a half ago, that I had worked up the courage to pray. Yes, courage. When I was younger, around the year 2007, I had tried to cast some spells which caused a disaster to come storming towards me from the other side. In praying to Thor, I was acknowledging and accepting whatever may come at me.
That night after I prayed, I had a dream. Thor was conducting a tour of all the realms for the new baby Heathens. There was a 'boarding' time, and the Heathen I was with was running late. In doing so, she had made both of us miss the tour. I was devastated and was sobbing, running around to try to find a way to catch up, but failed. I found myself running blindly and found a cave. It was a huge cave and deep in it was a large bed, dozens of pillows, and a window. I lay in the bed and cried, asking for forgiveness. I recall expressing that I wasn't sure if the gods were listening or could hear me, and suddenly Odin had appeared. He comforted me and assured me that they are always listening, always watching. Odin had requested Thor to pause the tour, and he did. With a flash of lightning and a boom of thunder, Thor had suddenly appeared, smiling. He reassured me that missing the tour was okay, and that things like this happen. Then, Thor had promised me my own private tour of the realms when I was prepared to go with him. If I recall correctly, I was given a type of onyx ring before I woke up, and was shocked. The following few weeks were spent of me talking to* Thor on my walk to work for my overnight shifts as a dispatch at my previous university's Department of Public Safety. Though, I became distracted by planning my trip to return to South Korea after four years, and was not planning to come back.
Approximately eight to nine months later, I prayed to Thor again. It had been so long, and I asked for forgiveness for straying for so long, especially after such an amazing dream. I was having a difficult time with a toxic person, who I dare not label as my significant other, as that is not a proper title. I had asked that I be protected as I tried to make that person leave my life, that the person would not try or succeed in physically harming me. That night, I had another dream. Now, let me give you all a note that I am terrified of water. I will shower, and I do everyday. But.. bathe? No thanks. Swimming pool trips? No. Beaches? I'll pass. Oceans? Absolutely nope, my friend. No boats, no floaty noodles, nothing. Water can stay below my knees, preferably below my ankles, and it can stay there.
Great, now that that is out of the way, let's proceed.
In this dream, it was such a peaceful feeling. I was at the water's edge, near an ocean. The sun was setting, and there were two gods with me. A male on my left side, female on my right. They both held me, their arms linked with mine. It felt as if they were smiling, but I remember their faces being quite flat. Behind me was Odin, his hands resting on my shoulders. They told me to trust them as they guided me into the ocean. I never felt an ounce of fear in my dream. I later did some research, and I believe it was Aegir and Ran who were with Odin and I.
I was excited and eager to begin my journey on my path of Norse Paganism. And, I still am. I've been having some phenomenal experiences with building my altars and my talks to the gods. Honestly, it took me some time to figure out it was Odin behind all the dreams and signs. Hey, I never said I was the most observant! ;)
Anyways, I have a lot of topics for future posts!
Thank you all for reading, and I will try my best to post regular updates!
Feel free to contact me via email or social media if you have any questions, comments, concerns, or stories you'd like to share.
*Pray: I feel like this is a super Christianized and formal way of thinking/being/acting. I prefer to use the phrase "*talking to". After some discussions and readings, I've come to my own personal conclusions, and these will also be discussed in upcoming posts.